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In turn, girls who fall for the mirage of upward mobility more easily identify when other girls go through this mirage than when it affects themselves (Puigvert, 2015–2016).The Free_Teens_Desire project (2015–2016), in which the present study is framed, also investigated to what extent dialogue situations based on a ‘language of desire’ instead of on a ‘language of ethics’ can question adolescent girls’ desires that link attractiveness to violent behaviours, gathering for the first time quantitative data on this link (Puigvert, 2015–2016).Accordingly, due to imbalanced power relationships between men and women, this coercive dominant discourse (e.g., through TV, teen magazines, social networks, popular media, among other things) influences many girls’ and women’s socialization into linking attractiveness to people with violent attitudes and behaviours.Different qualitative investigations have analysed the impact of this coercive dominant discourse.

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Nonetheless, research has revealed that in these cases, instead of increasing the girls’ or young women’s status or attractiveness, it decreases those qualities (Tellado et al., 2014).

The disassociation between both types of languages and the ‘language of desire’ missing from many gender violence campaigns prevents them from being effective.

In not using the language which adolescents and the media tend to use, the campaigns do not challenge the dominant model of socialization and the association between violence and attraction that this imposes (Flecha and Puigvert, 2010).

The language of ethics is often used to educate children in a non-sexist way, in both home and school contexts (Rios-González et al., 2018).

Parents and teachers thus talk about what ‘is good’ or what ‘should be done’, using cognitive schemata to assess sexual-affective lives that are grounded in ethics.

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